make my life difficult

by Annelie Westlund
(Antibes France)

I find out about dyslexia for 20 years I did a test in Sweden , for me it was a big reveal to know whats wrong with me. I had and I still have a lot of complex about being dyslexic
in my family its not excepted to be different; I try to explain to my parents why it was so difficult for me to learn in school when I was a kid but they don't want to know.

Today I don't live in Sweden I moved to France for 30 years ago I did learn to speak French and English but having big problem with writing in all languages even my mother tongue. Just for me to pick up a pen and write if someone is watching I will have a panic attack. I find that in my age my speech get more difficult can't find the right words och can't do the right pronouncement, get very often picked on for that specially at work.
I live with this and I can't talk about it because I have so much shame.

Once I did talk to by boss about it after I come back from Sweden doing the dyslexi test,
I told him why I did have problem writing correctly. That was a big mistake he fired me the day after. Sometimes or more often and befor I don't care I do write and I do know its mistake, I always said I can't write very well in French or English because its not my mother tongue but I have been here now over 30 years and I still can't write good in French whats wrong with her.... The worst is when I do big spelling mistake in Swedish,
All this give me a very bad self-confidence sometimes I wish didn't existed.

Thank you for reading

Annelie

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